The Son (a poem about the struggle of a boy)

Son (ciaksi)

The gravel road
winds its way like a snake
through the hills to the homes
of the Innu people who have
lived there for one hundred years.

Worn houses dot
the land in a similar fashion
with broken windows and sagging
porches in need of repairs that will
never be completed.

On grey days
the despair creeps its
way into the lives of children
caught in vague attempts to
find meaning.

Alcohol, drugs and
violence become ways
of interpretation that blind
and confuse reality.

On one such
grey day in a home
on a hill overlooking
the peaceful bay the pain
became too much to bear.

Her son who was her hope and
joy, found a quiet place, and with a bicycle chain, kinked it
around his neck, and stepped off the chair.     

 ---Todd Sojonky 2005

Talk about AIDS

We don't like to talk about it but we should.  AIDS is still killing people and there is no cure.  Prevention is crucial if we are to save lives.  Talk about sex with your kids, teach them about safe sex and read the current literature. The video below is a powerful visual message!  TJS

Adolescent Substance Abuse

“To understand adolescent substance abuse we need to understand first of all the cultural context in which it occurs. This, in a sense, is the first risk factor, and applies to most youth, for America has become a drug oriented society: in other words, our ethics with respect to the use of mood-altering chemicals are basically permissive and sympathetic.” (Joseph Nowinski)

Oppositional Defiant Disorder

It is a relatively new diagnosis that kids are labelled with and not always with a great deal of accuracy. Children with Oppositional Defiant Disorder repeatedly engage in a pattern of defiant, disobedient, and hostile behavior toward authority figures. This behavior goes beyond acceptable misbehavior for the given child's age and the behavior has been continued for at least six months.

The key is to help kids discover the comfort and discomfort within their homes. Kids who act like this have homes that are either 'way too controlled' or 'completely out of control.' The label really doesn't matter (except for funding in the school systems); what matters is how to enable kids to tell their stories, feel their feelings, and take responsibility for their actions. When a kid acts out I ask them to consider 'who they are hurting?' and 'what their goals and dreams are?' More often than not if a kid can see that they are inhibiting 'their OWN goals' they modify behavior. TJS

Canada's Third World People

Most people are not aware of it. The fact that many people in the Canadian north are dying. In one school division alone twelve suicide attempts in the past four months. Numerous acts of violence, missing women, and hungry kids. The schools throughout the Canadian north are the battlegrounds where teachers, principals and support staff work with the communities to find answers. Why are so many children in Saskatchewan dying? Why does no one seem to care? So this week in Sandy Bay a missing boy is now presumed dead. His footprints in the snow led to a spot near the ice. Like the stinging bite in the bitter wind. It warranted two paragraphs on the second page. If we have a sense of social justice it should begin at home. TJS



Moonlight Over a Northern School

If all the stories had the same voice or the words heard the same source then knowing would appear rational. Like I could touch and feel the voices in my head from the words that were said.

Or perhaps the knower takes the scalpel and removes the discourse from its voice and examines it laying dead. Then what hurt and bled could be touched and the discourse then made solid. Instead the words follow the trees and breeze cross the valleys and through the snow covered woods.

It is cold now and the moon shine has fragmented the solid structure of my mind. There is no reason to the voices only discourses dancing in the moonlight.

TJS 2009

My Family

"My family left me and I was really young. I had to live in a care home. Alcohol got to them and now it's getting to other people. I live in a foster home and I don't even think about it. Alcohol is an addiction that hooks people."

Always Believe

We go to a school in the north. There is a lot that is happening in the north. What’s not so good is the use of drugs and alcohol. We have a story in all of us that gives us a dark spot in our mind. People have families, we all do, but we can’t pick our mothers and fathers, but we all still love them.

Sometimes a dad or mom leaves the family and people have to deal with them leaving. People use drugs and alcohol to escape reality and avoid the depression of their lost love ones. Though everyone smiles I think we die inside. Who would leave a child alone in the streets or sell their belongings to get a fix? We all struggle with these bad things inside. We still have control and can change; we just have to believe it.

Dealing drugs and buying for others gets you cash but at what cost? You’re feeding the addiction that is the demon in us, keeping us from reaching our goals and holding us down. Part of having a choice is saying NO. Don’t give in and ALWAYS believe in your power.

Kelly

Stories

Everyone has a story. We are story. Kids and teachers love story and have a wonderful ability to see their lives through story. Counselling involves story. When we are hurt or vulnerable our story seems broken and when we are healing our story grows and becomes the exciting journey it is meant to be. Teachers, psychologists, counsellors should encourage story writing, story telling and story exploring. The kids who give up on life have lost story....lost where they are going in the wonderful narrative of life. Tell stories, read stories and encourage the kids who are struggling to see their story. TJS

The Crap I'm Going Through

"All the crap I am going through is tuff but I will make it. Through my day do not do what I do if your parents are getting a divorce. When your parents are getting a divorce do not let your schooling suffer because of it. It is never your fault. Do something fun instead of worrying about everything. Like play sports or if you are like me play your guitar. I will give you some advice. Do not ever pick a side between your parents because you will make it worse." ---Hey

Purpose!

"Everyone has a purpose in life, everyone has a reason to live. Life is like a road with a bunch of bumps and dents on them, the bumps and dents are your problems.

The road keeps on going and going. I love life and I try to make the best of it, as best as I can. I can really imagine a better world,I can't change it though.

But I am still trying. I NEED your help to change the world. I can't do it alone. So I'm still believing in what I see in my home town.

I still stand. Everyone has a purpose." ---Jenny

Bullies and Drugs

"This is me a kid who grew up in a small town in the north. This town has a lot of drugs and alcohol and that's were it all starts. It's because I didn't do any drugs or alcohol the people who did were all against me. It was like drugs were versus no drugs. It really sucks to start doing drugs and it's the wrong choice. I am drug free and I am damn proud besides if you don't do drugs or don't start you'll have something to brag about but back to my life as I was growing up. I was always being threatened of getting beaten up I was scared as more and more people came after me that's when I gave up on everything well mostly everything.

I gave up on my drawings that was sad because when I look at all my previous drawings it made me sad. I thought of going back but I realized I had no skill left but I will get back to that. I would like all you readers to know if you start doing drugs there is no going back to your real life you may be able to stop but it will never be the same. If you are still drug free take my advice and don't let them get to you even if you go through allot. I didn't give up and those people who tried bullying me will regret it and you will get something out of it. I always wanted to be a drummer and I just got a new drum set. It's stuff like this that you will get just by living your real life, no matter how hard it gets just don't give up and you will get rewarded." ---Patrick

Hopeful Eyes

Canada's northern school divisions face unique challenges. Poverty, broken families, alcohol, drugs, language barriers and isolation. New teachers find the isolation particularly difficult. Teacher turnover is high and kids are left wondering who their next teacher will be. But if there is a place that resiliency is alive it is there.

If ever Canada should be inspired it is in the northern kids who have overcome so much and still have hopeful eyes and playful spirits. Take the time and travel north as far as you can drive and offer some time to read to kids, bring some instruments and make music or sit and listen to a child's story. Google a northern school and send a principal a note of encouragement and if you go you will discover hopeful eyes. ---TJS

Family Love: A Sincere Valentine

Family Love

My family all loved me; they all did but my parents,
all they did was drink. They didn't care about me and they didn't know that I still love them.

I still love my parents even when they drink I will still love them.

I hardly get to see them anymore.
They live far away and always drink a lot.

But I still love them.

-----Willard (15yrs old)

Suicide

Nadine is a wonderful kid who has faced many obstacles. She is a bright light who will accomplish many of her goals. These are her words.........


"I've lost many friends to suicide; if I can't tell them this before they did it I will now.

Suicide isn't an easy thing to take and try to figure out alone. Sometimes you need someone to get you through all the rough things your going through.

Suicide is just being selfish and not thinking of who you are affecting. It is a chain of wrongs and bads that push you to the limit of just letting go. Knowing you are gone is tough, it fucken kills knowing you left us in this world without you.

I know you couldn't take the pain but now you made us suffer for what you did."

-----Nadine (R.I.P. JP)

Andrew

Andrew is one of hundreds of youth struggling with addictions and poverty in the Canadian north. He is one of the brave ones who want to change and needs our help. These are Andrew's words.....

"It's hard to quit cause people offer a blast, friends convince you to. And in order to have a blast you need money. So you get it. I want to go to treatment for three or four months. I know its ruining my life and making me depressed. I want help. If you want to get off drugs you need to look for new friends who don't do it. Talk to somebody you trust."

What about the kids?

The northern communities of Canada have more suicides, dropouts and domestic violence than anywhere else. I met a guy today who keeps the funeral handouts. He has stacks of them. Neatly folded memorial notes with charming pictures of teenagers on them. He had hundreds of them clipped together just so he could keep track. Kids who give up and give in to hopelessness. The media and most of the Canadian population seem to disregard the chaos. Instead we throw tax dollars at a problem hoping it will go away. It won't.

The other side of the issue are the hero's up here. In school today the hockey team wore ties---askew, single knot, double knot, mickey mouse, dad's old blue one. You could see the glimmer in their eyes. Hundreds of communities across Canada with good people and wonderful kids. But the bitter and the sweet walk hand in hand. These are tough places where kids are looking for something bigger than life. On a good day there are belly laughs in the school from guidance counsellors, principals and teachers all of whom care because hope is never gone. But hope requires us to see the world in need and to do something.....TJS

So What?

So the kid says, "so what?" "What if I just quit?" And the truth is I don't have an answer. Psychologist answer, teacher answer, counsellor answer, dad answer or any other one. He had every reason to quit. To walk away into the woods and never come back. His life sucked. He didn't know his dad and his mom is a drunk. So like thousands of others across Canada and in Saskatchewan he survives day to day. Chiseled into rap rhythm's and gangster chatter. Looking mean and lonely all at the same time. Hundreds of towns, villages and reserves that have kids who feel hopeless. Completely lost. So do any of us really care? Do we know what is happening to the isolated and lonely kids that fill our empty places. Places at the end of the road. Can we shout from our soap boxes, ivory tower desk tops, middle class two story lives, shout at the top of our lungs that life is worth living. To never give up and to ask a friend to hold your hand or walk round the block or simply stop long enough to see the world around you. The rising pines, the crystal blue moon, the remarkable quiet of the north. The kids there are wonderful, full of life, full of something worth while. The truth is they have the answer and just don't see it yet. TJS

Hero's

I just returned from a clinical posting in the far north of Saskatchewan. The people were kind, thoughtful and warm. But there was also a great deal of hurt. Violence, property damage and suicide. A young women was found hanging in her basement. Dozens of suicides through the years. Youth looking for meaning and purpose. The youth I talked to wanted so much more from their lives. They wanted kids to see how important life is. It seems so far removed from my home in Regina where we seem to measure success by SUV's and square footage. I talked with the girl's mom. She welcomed me into her story and shared how much she missed her daughter. The real hero's are there working to build a great school; mothers, elders, fathers, and teachers. The real hero's are the youth who care enough to discover hope in the middle of despair.