Meditation

When people begin to meditate, they often say that their thoughts are running riot and have become wilder than ever before. But I reassure them and say that this is a good sign. Far from meaning that your thoughts have become wilder, it shows that you have become quieter and are finally aware of just how noisy your thoughts have always been. Don’t be disheartened or give up. Whatever arises, just keep being present, keep returning to the breath, even in the midst of all the confusion.    ---Rigpa

Loss and Bereavement

Loss and bereavement can remind you sharply of what can happen when in life you do not show your love and appreciation, or ask for forgiveness, and so make you far more sensitive to your loved ones.

Elisabeth Kubler-Ross said: ‘What I try to teach people is to live in such a way that you say those things while the other person can still hear it.” And Raymond Moody, after his life’s work in near-death research, wrote: “I have begun to realize how near to death we all are in our daily lives. More than ever now I am very careful to let each person I love know how I feel.”   -Rigpa

My Brother and Mother's Death's

I wrote this last Christmas and had some requests to re post

 so here it is.  Peace and goodness to all.

Life

It’s Saturday night after a week of listening to stories in therapy and reflecting on who I am as a therapist. We carry our experience with us and it contributes to how we interact with each other. Often the stories I hear are painful ones. Many times people find it hard to let go. I find it hard to let go. It’s been nearly five years since I watched my brother die at 49. Held his hand as he took his last breath. Then four months later my mom died. Died, I guess, of a broken heart. She shut down and went away.

It doesn't mean I know what you feel. It doesn't mean that I understand. Instead it informs my ‘Toddness,’ my sense of ‘I am’. Their deaths as painful as they were became a part of the tapestry which is me. And in that me I can be happy. Happy that they are a part of the fabric of my life. So when I listen I do not know what you feel, but all of me which is colorfully made listens with a careful ear.   Peace. Todd

Mindfulness Workshop

Mindful Walking: Understanding Stress, Anxiety and Depression 

(limit of 14 people)

Saturday Nov. 23rd 

Living Spirit Centre 

3018 Doan Dr.

10:00am -12:00pm

$30.00 per person

Wear loose clothing and bring slippers or warm socks!

Please book directly through Dr. Todd Todd.sojonky@sasktel.net

Or 306 737-6533

Suffering

When someone is suffering and you find yourself at a loss to know how to help, put yourself unflinchingly in his or her place. Imagine as vividly as possible what you would be going through if you were suffering the same pain. Ask yourself: “How would I feel? How would I want my friends to treat me? What would I most want from them?”

When you exchange yourself for others in this way, you are directly transferring your cherishing from its usual object, yourself, to other beings. So exchanging yourself for others is a very powerful way of loosening the hold on you of the self-cherishing and the self-grasping of ego, and so of releasing the heart of your compassion.   ---Rigpa

Life

Life

It’s Saturday night after a week of listening to stories in therapy and reflecting on who I am as a therapist. We carry our experience with us and it contributes to how we interact with each other. Often the stories I hear are painful ones. Many times people find it hard to let go. I find it hard to let go. It’s been nearly five years since I watched my brother die at 49. Held his hand as he took his last breath. Then four months later my mom died. Died, I guess, of a broken heart. She shut down and went away.

It doesn't mean I know what you feel. It doesn't mean that I understand. Instead it informs my ‘Toddness,’ my sense of ‘I am’. Their deaths as painful as they were became a part of the tapestry which is me. And in that me I can be happy. Happy that they are a part of the fabric of my life. So when I listen I do not know what you feel, but all of me which is colorfully made listens with a careful ear.    Peace. Todd

Tears

There is a sacredness in tears. They are not the mark of weakness, but of power. They speak more eloquently than ten thousand tongues. They are the messengers of overwhelming grief, of deep contrition, and of unspeakable love.                                   -Washington Irving

Accepting your pain...

Whatever you do, don’t shut off your pain; accept your pain and remain vulnerable. However desperate you become, accept your pain as it is, because it is in fact trying to hand you a priceless gift: the chance of discovering, through spiritual practice, what lies behind sorrow.

“Grief,” Rumi wrote, “can be the garden of compassion. If you keep your heart open through everything, your pain can become your greatest ally in your life’s search for love and wisdom.”

-Rigpa Quote of the Day

Christmas isn't always Merry

Christmas isn't always Merry. Often the holiday brings memories of people we've lost. This is my second Christmas since my brother and mother died. They died within four months of each other. In my home Christmas meant that Mark and mom would be here; cooking, laughing, arguing and eating. I know there are many of you out there who have lost someone and like me today you are listening to Christmas carols, roasting a turkey and letting the memories of those you loved wander through your mind. So Christmas isn't always Merry but there can be a sense of celebration for the memories we have and the emotions they tug. So if you shed a tear or ten today let it come. Then smile and celebrate the fact that you allowed someone to become special in your life and that they will forever be a part of the fabric that is your world. Peace to all in the holiday season. TJS.

Losing your dad sucks...

"I lost my dad on December 18th and I watched him get buried on Christmas day. It makes me feel angry and I am angry because I had a shitty Christmas day this year."

Loss

Her

And so at the end of the night she had passed.
It came with the loss of something inside like
a dead branch in the thick of a cottony aster.

The pattern of life had changed within the moment
and what I did started to die. The movement to do
faded to grey and I wanted to sleep.

To pull the brittle twig from the brush
and throw it to the burning pile. Like a piece of
soul or spirit lodged in thought uprooted and
consumed in flames.

On this morning she was gone and I was a child again.

TJS, 2008

Death and Loss

Absence can leave a big dull lump in the middle of our stomach. Death, divorce and even losing a job can make you feel physically sick. A friend of mines dad just died and she asked me to speak at the funeral. I am not certain that I could ever say anything that would take the 'lump' away but in the spirit of life I try to help people celebrate living. In this case it was easy. Her father loved life, enjoyed playing the harmonica and would never put up with getting stuck in the death rut. The lump that never leaves. It really is about where our focus is and how we are changing within. 'Within' is not something that many north americans do very well. Sure some do but the vast majority of north americans live on the outside and become human doings NOT human beings. Death is just a reminder that the time we have should be cherished. That these bodies are only a passing phase. I joked with my friend that we should start a company called 'happy funerals' because that is what they need to be. You can't go backwards. The pain muddies our mental 'waters' and we can't see clearly. Be still. Listen to your life and a miracle will happen.